The birch stubbornness.

**this may be my new favorite video. i love the rendition 

of this beautiful song. it makes my heart miss Africa, my homeland!

I've been a little stubborn lately, a little stubborn with God.

I've been asking Him for something that I want with my whole heart, and trying to ignore that maybe what He knows is best for me is different from what I want. I must have a whole lot to learn about this particular subject, because He's really been testing me with accepting His will completely and fully, especially when His will and my will are on complete different ends of the spectrum. I'm grateful that He's teaching me, and I'm trying to do my best to completely give up what I want, even when it's something that I want with my whole entire heart. It's worth it, it just takes time for me.

It's not that what I want is bad,, but maybe it's just not what He knows is best. Good, better, best.
The Birch side (and I'd say the Wynn side, too ;) of my family is a little stubborn, which I think can be good at times. Makes us resilient, hard-working, passionate, steadfast. However, I wouldn't recommend being stubborn with the Man Upstairs. ;)

But I've realized that if what I want more than anything is to return to live with Him then I need to have greater faith in Him and His plan by accepting His will completely and with grateful heart. I wish I could just totally accept His will 100%, 24/7. Why is it so hard sometimes? I don't know. It's silly, because I know that He knows what is best for me. I know that He has a plan. But then why do I struggle to give up what I want for what I know He knows is best? That was confusing...sorry.

There is much I don't know in this world. There's so much more that I don't know than what I know. But I do know for sure that He is aware of me, and of you. He has a plan for each of us. And when we press forward, perfect in and with Christ as we strive to follow God and His commandments, we will be blessed. That's what I know.

I was reading in 1 Nephi 7 about faith.Nephi is speaking to his brothers, distraught over their hard hearts and slowness to remember God. I felt like it was perfect for the feelings I was having at that time...

 11 Yea, and how is it that ye have forgotten what great things the Lord hath done for us [and that He will yet do]?

12 Yea, and how is it that ye have forgotten that the Lord is able to do all things according to his will, for the children of men, if it so be that they exercise faith in him? Wherefore, let us be faithful to him.

ALL THINGS!!! Not just the things that we think are possible. Not just the things that we think are best. Not just the things that the world sees as acceptable. Not just the things our minds can comprehend.

We can't see what the Lord has in store. I can't at least...maybe you can! But I know that whatever He has in store, all will be well. He is our loving Father, and He has beautiful things in store for us all. I don't want to limit what He can do by begging for my will to be done. 

I've heard a saying once that, when life is rough it means something good is about to happen. Maybe that good thing is growth, learning something new, a big blessing on the horizon...or winning the lottery. Who knows. I wouldn't mind the latter ;) Buuut, since that isn't likely to happen, I'm going to look for the little miracles each day. It's pretty amazing when you make the conscience decision to open your mind and look for the little day-to-day miracles. Try it! You just might be amazed at how much you see :-)

love,
emily